Kody Brown Feels There’s ‘So A lot Left Unsaid, So A lot Left Undone’ After Son Garrison’s Suicide

Garrison, the son of Kody Brownand ex-wife Janellewas discovered useless at his Flagstaff, Arizona residence by brother Gabriel on March 5, 2024. His dying got here at a time when he, a few of his siblings and his father, Kody, had been nonetheless in a interval of estrangement, following a shifting household dynamic over COVID protocols.

As Janelle spoke about plans to bury his ashes in Wyoming — the place her mom, who was married to Kody’s father, is buried — she stated the memorial for him there would coincide with a reunion of kinds. She added that she additionally bought a plot subsequent to Garrison’s.

“The weekend that we’re selecting to go to Wyoming is a giant time in Wyoming, the place like all of the hometown folks come again. So it is type of already like a giant reunion for the small city that Cody grew up in,” she defined, earlier than including that Garrison’s dying “has caused quite a bit some therapeutic of relationships, which has been good.”

Meri Brown added that, following his dying, she was in a position to see “all the youngsters” collectively — one thing that hadn’t occurred in ages. “Everyone was collectively, aside from one,” she stated via tears, “And it took him passing to get all people collectively.”

“That simply is heartbreaking,” she added, “however, additionally, that is so like Garrison.”

For Kody, he stated that grief “hits you in waves” — and, when it hits him, he “cannot run from it” and he “can’t stop it from affecting me.” He additionally shared that, “out of the blue,” he’ll be overcome with what looks like an “anxiousness assault” — explaining it as “only a deep, overwhelming feeling that I will by no means see him once more. There’s a lot left unsaid. A lot left undone.”

As Kody, his children with remaining spouse Robyn Brownand Robyn herself went to Wyoming collectively earlier than Garrison’s graveside memorial, he confirmed the youngsters the place he grew up — placing a extra uplifting spin on the intense journey. Regardless of his cheery demeanor, Robyn expressed concern for her husband in confessionals.

“I’m nervous about Kody in the course of the graveside and the way he’ll deal with it, and I am additionally actually nervous about afterwards,” she defined. “I’ve seen him grieving. I’ve held area for him whereas he is grieving. We have grieved collectively. It would not actually ever go away. Typically a dying can actually change an individual. I simply hope he can discover these wholesome methods to grieve.”

“I really feel just like the graveside service can be very unhappy,” she stated, getting choked up. “It is bitter than we’re laying him to relaxation, but it surely’s additionally as a result of we love him. That day is about him.”

Of the journey to Wyoming, Kody stated it has been a mixture of mourning and “doing glad issues,” in order that they’re in a position to “place confidence in the hereafter and in our personal futures and our personal lives.” Getting teared up, Kody added {that a} poster of his son will at all times be on the wall in his storage — one that may depart him at all times questioning “marvel what was missed sooner or later that might have been.”

“It is a sport of consciousness to maneuver with grief, to make your blood candy as an alternative of bitter from the ache,” he added.

Elsewhere within the hour, Christine Brown opened up about her personal distance from Garrison earlier than his dying, stated there “had been so many occasions he was alive the place I would not speak to him for a few weeks.” Wanting again, she stated, “Typically a month would go by and I would not contact base. That is a tragedy. I do not need that to occur with the opposite children too.”

As she stated she was “scared to neglect him,” she pushed again at anybody suggesting he is “in a greater place now” — telling her husband, David, “No, he is not. The higher place is with us. I simply miss him so fierce.”

“I am by no means going to be a grandma to his children,” she informed David. “I am not going to see him get married. He will not be there for (her son) Paedon’s wedding ceremony. Paedon and I had been speaking about that, and he is like, he was speculated to be my greatest man.”

Her husband insisted they’d get via this collectively.

Sister Wives airs Sundays on TLC.

Should you or somebody you already know is combating despair or has had ideas of harming themselves or taking their very own life, get assist. The Nationwide Suicide Prevention Lifeline (1-800-273-8255) supplies 24/7, free, confidential assist for folks in misery.